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Forum "Korrekturlesen" - activity
activity < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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activity: korrektur?
Status: (Frage) beantwortet Status 
Datum: 14:24 Sa 28.11.2009
Autor: little.bubble

Hallo!
Es wüde mich überaus freuen, wenn jemand diesen Text durchlesen könnte und diesen vl auch korrigieren könnte!!!!
DANKE im Vorraus!

Activity “Snowman drawing”
Words:
o)receptive: Draw a black hat on the snowman on the right. - Draw a green hat on the snowman on the left. - Draw to eyes on each snowman’s head. - Draw a round and pink nose on the snowman on the right. - Draw an orange carrot nose on the snowman on the left. - Draw a red smiling mouth on the middle snowman’s head. - Draw a red round mouth on the snowman’s head on the right. - Draw a red sad mouth on the right snowman’s head. - Draw three black buttons on the centre part of the snowman in the middle. - Draw two black buttons on the centre part of the snowman on the right. - Draw four black buttons on the centre part of the snowman on the left. - Draw two brown twig arms on the snowman in the middle. - Now are three little snowmen ready. Let’s compare our snowmen!
o)productive: II) colours, arm, head, centre part, hat, bottom, eyes, nose, mouth, broom, scarf, Draw … on the snowman’s head.

Conditions:
colours, body parts, emotions,

Skills:
o)linguistic skills: understanding a row of introductions and transpose these into a drawing
II) use phrases and give orders how to draw the snowman
o)cognitive, motorically and social skills: compare the drawing on the board with their own drawing; train the finemotoric by drawing details

Materials:
a sheet of paper on which are three outlined snowmen

Description:
Each Student gets a sheet of paper on which are three outlined snowmen handed out. Say: “Now we will together draw these three snowmen. Put out your pencil case and listen carefully!”

1.Draw a black hat on the snowman on the right.
2.Draw a green hat on the snowman on the left.
3.Draw to eyes on each snowman’s head.
4.Draw a round and pink nose on the snowman on the right.
5.Draw an orange carrot nose on the snowman on the left.
6.Draw a red smiling mouth on the middle snowman’s head.
7.Draw a red round mouth on the snowman’s head on the right.
8.Draw a red sad mouth on the right snowman’s head.
9.Draw three black buttons on the pat of the snowman in the middle.
10.Draw two black buttons on the centre part of the snowman on the right.
11.Draw four black buttons on the centre part of the snowman on the left.
12.Draw two brown twig arms on the snowman in the middle.
13.Now are three little snowmen ready. Let’s compare our snowmen!

Put the correct drawing on the board. The children compare their own drawing with the dawning on the board. Ask how has drawn the right snowmen.
Put all drawings on the board. The children can comment the other drawings too. After this activity you can use these drawings as a decoration for the classroom.



II) The students get into pairs. Between them there should be a folder or a school bag so that they can’t see the drawing of the other. One student begins drawing an easy snowman. Then this pupil describes his snowman and the other pupil tries to draw it. They should use these phrases:
o Draw one/two (…) red/orange (…) nose/eyes/hat (…) on the snowman’s head.
o Draw one/two button/s on the centre part of the snowman.
Then the students change the roles.

Intelligences:
o linguistic
o bodily-kinaesthetic (finemotoric)
o visual-spatial
o II) social:
o interpersonal




        
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activity: Antwort
Status: (Antwort) fertig Status 
Datum: 15:44 Sa 28.11.2009
Autor: mmhkt

Guten Tag,
einige Anmerkungen und Vorschläge ohne Anspruch auf Vollständigkeit:

>  
> Activity “Snowman drawing”
>  Words:
>  o)receptive: Draw a black hat on the snowman on the right.
> - Draw a green hat on the snowman on the left. - Draw two
> eyes on each snowman’s head. - Draw a round and pink nose
> on the snowman on the right. - Draw an orange carrot nose
> on the snowman on the left. - Draw a red smiling mouth on
> the middle snowman’s head. - Draw a red round mouth on
> the snowman’s head on the right. - Draw a red sad mouth
> on the right snowman’s head. - Draw three black buttons
> on the centre part of the snowman in the middle. - Draw two
> black buttons on the centre part of the snowman on the
> right. - Draw four black buttons on the centre part of the
> snowman on the left. - Draw two brown twig arms on the
> snowman in the middle. - Now are three little snowmen
> ready. (Ich würde "are" zwischen und "snowmen" und "ready" setzen.) Let’s compare our snowmen!

>  o)productive: II) colours, arm, head, centre part, hat,
> bottom, eyes, nose, mouth, broom, scarf, Draw … on the
> snowman’s head.
>  
> Conditions:
> colours, body parts, emotions,
>
> Skills:
>  o)linguistic skills: understanding a row of introductions
> and transpose these into a drawing
> II) use phrases and give orders how to draw the snowman
>  o)cognitive, motorically and social skills: compare the
> drawing on the board with their own drawing; train the
> finemotoric by drawing details
>  
> Materials:
> a sheet of paper on which are three outlined snowmen
>  
> Description:
> Each Student gets a sheet of paper on which are three
> outlined snowmen handed out. (ich bin mir nicht ganz sicher, aber ich könnte mir "handed out" auch nach "paper" vorstellen.) Say: “Now we will together
> draw these three snowmen. Put out your pencil case and
> listen carefully!”
>  
> 1.Draw a black hat on the snowman on the right.
> 2.Draw a green hat on the snowman on the left.
> 3.Draw two eyes on each snowman’s head.
>  4.Draw a round and pink nose on the snowman on the right.
>  5.Draw an orange carrot nose on the snowman on the left.
>  6.Draw a red smiling mouth on the middle snowman’s
> head.
>  7.Draw a red round mouth on the snowman’s head on the
> right.
>  8.Draw a red sad mouth on the right snowman’s head.
>  9.Draw three black buttons on the pat of the snowman in
> the middle.
>  10.Draw two black buttons on the centre part of the
> snowman on the right.
>  11.Draw four black buttons on the centre part of the
> snowman on the left.
>  12.Draw two brown twig arms on the snowman in the middle.
>  13.Now are three little snowmen ready. (ich würde "are" zwischen "snowmen" und "ready" einsetzen.) Let’s compare our
> snowmen!
>  
> Put the correct drawing on the board. The children compare
> their own drawing with the dawning drawing on the board. Ask how who
> has drawn the right snowmen.
> Put all drawings on the board. The children can comment the
> other drawings too. (Wenn ich mich recht erinnere, kam vor "too" immer ein Komma.) After this activity you can use these
> drawings as a decoration for the classroom.
>  
>
>
> II) The students get into pairs. Between them there should
> be a folder or a school bag so that they can’t see the
> drawing of the other. One student begins drawing an easy
> snowman. Then this pupil describes his snowman and the
> other pupil tries to draw it. They should use these
> phrases:
>  o Draw one/two (…) red/orange (…) nose/eyes/hat (…)
> on the snowman’s head.
>  o Draw one/two button/s on the centre part of the
> snowman.
>  Then the students change the roles.
>  
> Intelligences:
>  o linguistic
>  o bodily-kinaesthetic (finemotoric)
>  o visual-spatial
>  o II) social:
>  o interpersonal
>  
>
>  

Soweit in Kürze.
Vielleicht sieht jemand anderes noch etwas.

Schönes Wochenende
mmhkt


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activity: Mitteilung
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 23:05 Sa 28.11.2009
Autor: Lorli3

Ich weiß zwar nicht, was der Zweck der Übung ist, aber: mit den vorgenommenen Korrekturen ist der Text o.k.

Lorli3

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activity: Mitteilung
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 23:31 Sa 28.11.2009
Autor: mmhkt

Hallo lorli,
der Zweck der Übung für den Verfasser:
Wie mir scheint, ist eine (angehende) Lehrperson dabei, eine Unterrichtsstunde vorzubereiten.
Und das eben in englischer Sprache weil es ja sonst keiner mehr versteht, heutzutage in Deutschland... ;-)

Der Zweck der Übung für die Schulkinder ist im Text unten erklärt.

Schönes Restwochenende
mmhkt


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activity: Mitteilung
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 11:54 So 29.11.2009
Autor: little.bubble

vielen vielen dank für eure raschen rückmeldungen........das ist wirklich sehr nett!
lg

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activity: Mitteilung
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 12:37 So 29.11.2009
Autor: Lorli3

Ich habe doch noch ein paar Fehler entdeckt:

1)"feinmotorisch" heißt nicht "fine-motoric"; sondern
Feinmotorik = "minute motoric activities"
(minute wird hier nicht wie "Minute" ausgesprochen sondern heißt "klein/winzig" Aussprache: [mai'nju:t]
feinmotorisch hieße dann "minute motoric active".

2. -" Now are three little snowmen ready."

Achtung wordorder!!: richtig: Thre little snowmen are ready now. (now evtl. auch am Satzanfang)

3. Deine Überschrift: "Snowmen drawing";

ich würde vorziehen: "The Drawing of Snowmen"
(Berachte, in Überschriften werden Nomen groß geschrieben).

4. "understanding a row of introductions and transpose these ..."
du hast hier zwei Verben; das eine ist nominalisiert (gerund) = understanding"; warum das zweite (transpose) dann nicht?
Also entweder beide ins Gerund oder beide als Infinitive!!

5.
"...with their own drawing; ..."

Aufpassen!: haben alle nur eine Zeichnung gemeinsam gemacht? Nein; also: ...their drawings ...

6. "...a sheet of paper on which are three outlined snowmen ..."

hier wieder word order Fehler: ...on which there are ...

(ich würde besser finden: on which there are the outlines of three snowmen...)

7. "...Each Student .."

student klein!! besser "pupil", wenn es sich im Unterstufenschüler handelt.

8. "...“Now we will together draw these three snowmen..."

"together" steht falsch:
...these three snowmen together.

9.
"Put out your pencils"

Generationen von Anfangsunterrichtsschülern haben gelernt: herausnehmen = take out

10. Oh du mein dicker Herr Vater!!

"Put (a) the correct (b)drawing on the board. The children compare their own drawing (c)with the dawning (d) on the board. Ask how (e)has drawn the right snowmen.(f)

a) glue, paste, tape oder stick  aber nicht put
b) was heißt hier correct? Sind die Zeichnungen denn schon berichtigt worden?
du meinst sicherlich "fertig = ready"
c) das hatten wir schon
d)Rechtschreibfehler "drawing"
e)how heißt "wie"; wer heißt "who"
f) who has drawn  "a correct snowman"

Well, "mit dem Zweiten sieht man besser";
meine erste Durchsicht gestern war doch etwas zu spät.

Lorli3




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activity: Mitteilung
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 19:46 Do 03.12.2009
Autor: little.bubble

Liebe lori!
Danke! Danke! für deine korrektur! ich finde das wirklich sehr nett, dass ihr euch die zeit nehmt und den Text korrigiert! das hilft mir sehr weiter!
mfg

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activity: Antwort
Status: (Antwort) fertig Status 
Datum: 14:20 Mo 30.11.2009
Autor: hotblack

Hallo,
nochmal drüber geschaut, Korrekturen in rot, Vorschläge in grün. Kann auch sein, dass ich Lorli teilweise wiederhole...

Activity “Snowman drawing”
Words:
o)receptive: Draw a black hat on the right snowman's head( on the right).
- Draw a green hat on the left snowman's head( on the left).
- Draw totwo eyes (on)into each snowman’s (head)face.

into left/right snowman's face als Vorschlag für die nächsten fünf

- Draw a round and pink nose on the snowman on the right.
- Draw an orange carrot nose on the snowman on the left.
- Draw a red smiling mouth on the middle snowman’s head.
- Draw a red round mouth on the snowman’s head on the right.
- Draw a red sad mouth on the right snowman’s head.

Hmm, um welche Klasse handelt es sich denn hier? Unten als conditions angegeben sind außerdem Körperteile, aber "center part" ist nicht wirklich ein Körperteil... Vielleicht einfach nur body, was aber anatomisch nicht korrekt ist. Wenn die Schüler alt genug sind würde ich schon torso nutzen.
Dann für die nächsten drei: onto the left/right snowman's body/torso

- Draw three black buttons on the centre part of the snowman in the middle.
- Draw two black buttons on the centre part of the snowman on the right.
- Draw four black buttons on the centre part of the snowman on the left.
- Draw two brown twig arms on the snowman in the middle.
- Now are three little snowmen are ready. Let’s compare our snowmen!
o)productive: II) colours, arm, head, centre part, hat, bottom, eyes, nose, mouth, broom, scarf, Draw … on the snowman’s head.s.o.

Conditions:meinst du hier vllt Vorraussetzungen = Preconditions?
colours, body parts, emotions,

Skills:
o)linguistic skills: understanding a row of introductionsintroduction = Einführung, du meinst sicher: instructions and transpose these into a drawing
II) use phrases and give orders how to draw the snowman
o)cognitive, motorically and social skills: compare the drawing on the board with their own drawings; train the finemotoricfine motor skills by drawing details

Materials:
a sheet of paper on which are three outlined snowmenthree snowmen are outlinedoder: ... on which the outlines of three snowmen are drawn

Description:
Each Studentpupil gets a sheet of paper on which are three outlined snowmens.o.handed outwird hier nicht gebraucht. Say: “Now we will together draw these three snowmentogether. PutTake out your pencil case and listen carefully!”

s.o.
1.Draw a black hat on the snowman on the right.
2.Draw a green hat on the snowman on the left.
3.Draw to eyes on each snowman’s head.
4.Draw a round and pink nose on the snowman on the right.
5.Draw an orange carrot nose on the snowman on the left.
6.Draw a red smiling mouth on the middle snowman’s head.
7.Draw a red round mouth on the snowman’s head on the right.
8.Draw a red sad mouth on the right snowman’s head.
9.Draw three black buttons on the pat of the snowman in the middle.
10.Draw two black buttons on the centre part of the snowman on the right.
11.Draw four black buttons on the centre part of the snowman on the left.
12.Draw two brown twig arms on the snowman in the middle.
13.Now are three little snowmen ready. Let’s compare our snowmen!

Put the correct drawing on the board.
Siehe Lorli, wer bestimmt den die Korrektheit? Oder hast du selber eine korrekte Zeichnung angefertigt und pinnst die dann an die Tafel? Wenn ja, würd ich das so beschreiben: Put a prepared correct drawing on the board.
The children compare their own drawing with the dawning on the board. Ask howwho has drawn the right snowmen.
Put all drawings on the board. The children can comment the other drawings too. After this activity youVorschlag: unpersönlich, also one can use these drawings as a decoration for the classroom.



II) The studentss.o. (get into)form pairs. Between them there should be a folder or a school bag on the tableso that theyone can’t see the drawing of the other. One students.o. begins drawing an easy snowman. Then this pupil describes his snowman and the other (pupil)one tries to draw it. They should use these phrases:
Hier gelten die gleichen Vorschläge wie oben
o Draw one/two (…) red/orange (…) nose/eyes/hat (…) on the snowman’s head.
o Draw one/two button/s on the centre part of the snowman.
Then the students change the roles.

IntelligencesWas soll denn das heissen?Intelligence ist auf jeden Fall unzählbar, wahrscheinlich meinst du skills?:
o linguistic
o bodily-kinaesthetic (finemotoric)s.o.
o visual-spatial
o II) social:
o interpersonal


Bei Fragen einfach melden!

Gruß,
hotblack

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activity: Mitteilung
Status: (Mitteilung) Reaktion unnötig Status 
Datum: 20:00 Do 03.12.2009
Autor: little.bubble

Auch an alle anderen DANKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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